fredag 2 december 2011

A short story for 6-9 year olds

A snowflake journey

Once upon a time it was a little snowflake who called himself Mr Frost. Mr Frost lived in a cloud far far up in the sky, together with his friends. One day it blew up a storm and the cloud was blowing with a tremendous speed over the city. Suddenly it stopped blowing and Mr Frost had a very strange feeling in his stomach. It felt like he was flying, and that was exactly what he was doing.  

“What’s happening?”, Mr Frost shouted.
“I think our cloud exploded in the storm”, Ms Cold answered.
“Oh no! Does that mean we’re falling from the sky and will land on the earth soon?”, asked Mr Frost sadly.
“Yes, that’s what will happen, but why do you seem so sad?” Ms Cold asked.
“Because I will not be able to play with you and everyone else then”, said Mr Frost.

When Mr Frost hade flown for a while he started to enjoy the feeling he had in his stomach. He opened his eyes and saw a city that was shining. It was dark outside and every house had lamps that spread a wonderful shimmer over the city. Mr Frost stopped to think about what would happen when he landed and enjoyed the last bit down from the sky.

When he at last landed in front of a red little house he started to think of his friends again. Mr Frost wondered where they had landed. But he stopped thinking about them quite soon because the flight had made him very tired. He closed his eyes and fell asleep at once.

In the little red house there lived a boy and a girl. One morning when they woke up they saw that the garden was full of snow. They were thrilled and they couldn’t wait to come out and play in the snow. After they had eaten breakfast, they went outside and played. The boy and the girl did everything from snow angels to a snowman.

When Mr Frost woke up after his sleep he remembered what happened yesterday and felt quite sad again. But when I opened his eyes he looked right in to the red little houses window and he saw something strange. The window was like a mirror and  Mr Frost saw a snowman made of all of his friends. Mr Frost had now reunited with all his friends and he was happier than ever. 



4 kommentarer:

  1. A good story.

    In the sentence "When Mr Frost hade flown for a while" you should use the word "had" instead of "hade"

    And in the sentence "But when I opened his eyes he looked right in to the red" I think you should write "But when he opened" instead of "I"

    But a nice story! :)

    SvaraRadera
  2. What a cute story ;) I think you should write "once upon a time THERE was" I think it would sounds better.. but I don't know if its right or wrong..

    SvaraRadera
  3. Your story looks great. The few things I saw have already been mentioned.

    SvaraRadera
  4. Oh, what a cute little story!! I agree with Johannas´comments and also "the red little houses window" - "the little red house window" and I think "made of all of his friends" = "made of all his friends", "Mr Frost had now reunited with" = "Mr Frost was now reunited with", but I´m not sure. Anyway- a good story.

    SvaraRadera